It was cool to read this lesson in two books over the span of a few days.
Things Learned From…
Chop Wood Carry Water, by Joshua Medcalf
Akira:
“Most importantly, please don’t try and teach your friends and family the lessons you learned here.”
John:
“But that doesn’t make any sense”
Akira:
“John, it is different here because you sought out this environment to grow and transform.
There will be people who ask you for wisdom, and feel free to share it with them, BUT you must never cross boundaries without an invitation.
A wise man once said ‘the difference between a pest and a guest is an invitation.’
You have gained so much wisdom while you are here, but most people won’t be interested in learning or changing.
[...]
If I were the best heart surgeon in the world, and my best friend had a heart problem that only I could fix, does that give me permission to do surgery on him? … I would still need permission to perform heart surgery.
Even though you are equipped with life changing wisdom that could transform lives, you must not share it without an invitation.
Most people just want to be heard and loved, they don’t want your wisdom, and that is OK!
Sometimes, you can actually become the greatest impediment to other people growing when you try and force things on them.
In time, if they see you model it, they will probably start to ask for help.
Life Is So Good, by George Dawson and Richard Glaubman
George Dawson:
“See that man across the street on his porch? That’s my neighbor. We’ve lived across the street from each other for years.
He seems like a nice man. Right now I can look at him and think maybe he could do better with his life if he would change it some.
I’ve been around a few years and I could tell him some things that he might do that could maybe improve his life. But I don’t do that.”
Richard Glaubman:
“Why not?”
George:
“He never asked me for any advice.”
Richard:
“So, you don’t give advice unless someone asks?”
George:
“See, I might think I know what’s best for him, but I don’t know what is really in that man’s heart.
I might think I do and tell him do this and do that.
He might nod his head, but if in his heart he isn’t ready to change, it won’t make no difference, maybe even make for some bad feelings between us.”
Richard:
“Bad feelings, even though you would just be trying to help?”
George:
“Unless a man asks for advice, he don’t really want it.
He isn’t gonna thank you for something he don’t need yet.
[…]
[And only give advice] if a man really means it when he asks.
Most people ask a question when they got the answer in mind that they want to hear.
That’s not really a question. They just want you to help them prove what they already be thinking.
[…]
If someone is being honest, I’m happy to listen.
Thanks for reading! Hope you have an exceptional day.